Even with the scare from the dead guy at Kroger, we decided to go back yesterday, as we still needed the food we had put in the carts before running away.
Jerry was very pleased with himself. He had spent Friday evening and Saturday morning studying his copy of Max Brooks' "Zombie Survival Guide" as if his life depended on it. He was ready. He had his Samurai sword, and found a snow shovel and several 2x4's to use as weapons.
I had kept a copy of the "Zombie Survival Guide" in my bathroom, as it is a pretty humorous book. Max Brooks is Mel Brooks' son. I am a huge fan of Mel Brooks movies. My favorite is Young Frankenstein, but Blazing Saddles is a close second.
I digress. Jerry was using a book obviously written tongue-in-cheek about a non-existent thing called a zombie to guide his actions. He was pretty serious about it too. He became annoyed when Greg and I ignored his coaching on how we would deal with the thing if we saw it again at Kroger.
We decided to humor Jerry and take the snow shovel and 2x4's with us. We also brought Johnny Dog, as she seemed to be able to smell the thing before we would be able to detect it. I made sure I had her on a leash, as she was a real handful on our last visit.
We arrived at Kroger and hung out in the Jeep for a while to see if there was any activity in the store. We rolled down a window, but Johnny Dog seemed content to just sit there.
We had a plan. We backed the Jeep up to within 20 feet of the open window and left the doors and rear hatch open. I held Johnny Dog's leash, Greg had a snow shovel and Jerry had his sword. The carts we had left behind on our last visit were still inside undisturbed. I stood guard near the window with Johnny Dog, while Greg and Jerry grabbed the carts and loaded the Jeep. The perishables still seemed OK, as the temperature outside had been below freezing for a couple of days, and the inside of the Kroger was not much warmer.
"Ready to go?" I asked after Greg had thrown the last bag of dog food in the Jeep.
"Yes, let's go." Answered Greg.
Jerry chimed in. "We ought to see if that thing is still around. Aren't you guys slightly curious?"
Greg responded. "Not me. I'd just as soon get outta here."
No sooner had Greg responded, when Johnny Dog started barking. She took off for the bakery department and about yanked my arm off as I put a tighter grip on her leash.
This was Jerry's opportunity. "Let me just go around the corner and see what's up."
Before we could stop him he walked down the front of the store and peered around the corner to the bakery.
"Holy shit!" He exclaimed. "Come check this out!"
Johnny Dog was still barking and wanted to head towards the bakery anyway, so Greg and I went to where Jerry was standing. As we approached, I was stunned at what I saw. The person or thing or whatever you wanted to call it was kneeling over another human body. It had torn open the body's chest cavity, and was feeding on it's insides.
I suddenly had to puke, and as I did, loosened my grip on Johnny Dog's leash. She tore way, and jumped on the thing's back. It immediately stood and tried to fight Johnny Dog off. Johnny Dog didn't try to bite it, but grabbed it's shirt, as if she was trying to save the person it was feeding on.
The thing turned around and started towards us, Johnny Dog in tow. Greg and I ran. As we approached the window we realized Jerry hadn't followed us.
Just then we heard a blood-curdling scream. "HEEEEEEEEYAAAAAAA!"
We had to go back, as we feared that Jerry had been attacked. As we rounded the corner to the bakery, and to our surprise, there was Jerry, standing over the thing, with his sword sticking out of it's head.
"Wow Jerry!" Greg exclaimed. "Unbelievable! You friggin' killed it!"
Jerry seemed a little bit stunned. "I..I...I...th...th.. think I did."
"Are we sure it's dead?" I asked.
"Well, according to the survival guide, you have to get these things in the head, obliterate the brain." Jerry responded.
"You certainly did that!" Greg observed.
Johnny Dog had returned to me. Jerry put his shoe against the thing's neck and yanked the sword out of it's skull. I suddenly felt sick again. As I turned to puke, Johnny Dog started to growl. This time she wasn't growling at the thing under Jerry's shoe, but at the body it had been feeding on.
The body was a mess. The thing had ripped out must of it's innards. It was obviously dead.
Or so I thought. As we turned to leave, we started to hear a noise, a gurgling slash moaning sound. I turned around. The body the thing had been feeding on was coming back to life!
"Look at that!" I yelled. This time I had a tight grip on Johnny Dog.
"It's not going anywhere, our friend here did so much damage to it that it can't get up." Jerry said.
"What do we...." but before I could finish, Greg walked over to it and bashed it's head in with his 2x4.
This time Jerry puked. "Let's get outta here." Greg said softly. "I don't want to deal with any more of these things."
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